Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
