STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
where are you?
Hypothermia
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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