i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
