Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
