well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
