is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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