After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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