We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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