she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
