I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize