if i died would you start the facebook group?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
