You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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