Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
