I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize