I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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