so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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