So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Randomize
