The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
