it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
it's like iHOP with fire
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
