Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
