Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
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