Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
