you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Randomize
