So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
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