he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize