? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
