Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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