Farmville is her only friend.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
pray to the hookup gods
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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