Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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