Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize