is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize