Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
