STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
