I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
she peed on how many people?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize