Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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