I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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