If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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