I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
