i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
