He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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