sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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