New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
