You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
