in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
