i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
