Sponge bath it is.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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