So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
