So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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