love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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