So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
