OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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