They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
